Homes for Pregnant

Teens and Young Moms

From 50 Ways You Can Be Prolife

by Tony Campolo and Gordon Aeschliman

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Hundreds of thousands of our homes are virtually vacant. The kids have grown, and now there are two or three bedrooms that do nothing but hold memories and collect dust. An older couple or a widowed person rattles around in the empty space. How about linking them to our commitment to being prolife?

Each year thousand of pregnant teens decide to carry their babies rather than abort. The decision regarding adoption or single parenting may not be made right away; for now the major life question is making it through the pregnancy. Kids who have elected to stay pregnant tell of some of the stresses: Mom or Dad may use the growing tummy as an opportunity to "make a point" about how stupid and disobedient the girl has been; family members who disapprove of the decision may make life uncomfortable in the daily routine at home; peers may ridicule the teenager throughout her pregnancy.

The decision to choose for life is difficult enough. We need to help that child make it through a noble choice. Sometimes that means helping her temporarily relocate.

We are told stories of families who make their extra bedrooms available to these pregnant teens---homes away from home where the child is able to attend school in another district for six months and experience the loving care of adults who don’t carry the baggage of family ties. The girl’s parents are encourage to visit at times, to go on outings together, buy clothes and give hugs. The pressure and embarrassment are reduced for everyone. Fortunately not all pregnant teens require this separation, but it’s wonderful to have this option available for those who need it.

A vacant bedroom can also serve a single mom and her child, until she gets back on her feet. The months immediately after a divorce, separation, death, loss of job or unplanned birth can literally throw a single mom into poverty and a life on the streets. The extra cost of rent and utilities can be just the final nudge over the edge to ruin.

Why not actively seek ways to link up single moms with older folks who have extra bedrooms? The ministry goes both ways---each contributes to the life of the other. Organizing this linkage is easy enough. Get the word out at church that you are looking for folks to make their homes available. And get the word out to single moms. You may consider this a good ministry to people outside the church. If so, contact the local government department in your area that is in charge of child and family services. They regularly encounter single moms in crisis and would likely be happy to make your name available.

We recommend, though, that you form a support group for folks who are willing to provide this service. Taking someone into your home is time-consuming, often frustrating, sometimes even dangerous. Some hosts have been robbed of valuables, threatened physically and accused falsely. It’s a tough job! Though they do it "as unto the Lord," these people need a group that will help them and pray them through it.

We want to emphasize the need not to "trap" needy people with your love. It is easy to judge others and consider ourselves slightly above their choices and consequences. The church needs to be a safe have for pregnant teens and single moms, a place not of condemnation but of emotional support and warmth. Be careful not to offer housing as a means of evangelizing. Such an approach is dishonest and degrading. The Lord will provide natural opportunities to share your faith if your guest is not part of the Christian Family. Pray for sensitivity to those moments.

(Originally published in 1993, 50 Ways You Can Be Prolife is now out of print. Used by permission of the authors, 9/27/01.)